Why blog?
Why blog?
It's part of my strategy to stay sane in the face of decreasing functional capacity. This year has been the worst since first becoming ill in 2001. I've found it essential to expand my repertoire of home-based pursuits in order to manufacture something resembling a more meaningful existence and to bolster a flagging sense of self-worth eroded by years of disability. Meaningful moments and achievements in which one can take pride . . . the potential for these is bundled in the day-to-day traffic of most relatively healthy and balanced lives. They may be invisible to us and we may take them for granted, but they are normally there.
Being largely housebound, the life challenge shifts from simply uncovering these as latent potentials to in fact creating them mostly from scratch, and this requires you try that little bit harder, precisely when you are least able to do so.
It's a tough one.
Accumulated grief over lost opportunities, abandoned career and other life-plans threaten to overwhelm on a daily basis, so you need to get particularly smart about it.
Ergo the blog.
Apart from its main purpose of (hopefully) keeping me connected (or perhaps re-connecting me) with the people in my life -- sort of popping my head up to say "Hi. Although I can't visit and I'm usually too brain-fogged to keep up my end of a phone conversation, I am thinking of you" -- the very process of composing and refining a post over a few days, of mastering the software and even learning a bit of HTML code are all achievements in which I can take some small measure of pride, allowing me to feel there are aspects of my life I still have the power to drive forward.
It's part of my strategy to stay sane in the face of decreasing functional capacity. This year has been the worst since first becoming ill in 2001. I've found it essential to expand my repertoire of home-based pursuits in order to manufacture something resembling a more meaningful existence and to bolster a flagging sense of self-worth eroded by years of disability. Meaningful moments and achievements in which one can take pride . . . the potential for these is bundled in the day-to-day traffic of most relatively healthy and balanced lives. They may be invisible to us and we may take them for granted, but they are normally there.
Being largely housebound, the life challenge shifts from simply uncovering these as latent potentials to in fact creating them mostly from scratch, and this requires you try that little bit harder, precisely when you are least able to do so.
It's a tough one.
Accumulated grief over lost opportunities, abandoned career and other life-plans threaten to overwhelm on a daily basis, so you need to get particularly smart about it.
Ergo the blog.
Apart from its main purpose of (hopefully) keeping me connected (or perhaps re-connecting me) with the people in my life -- sort of popping my head up to say "Hi. Although I can't visit and I'm usually too brain-fogged to keep up my end of a phone conversation, I am thinking of you" -- the very process of composing and refining a post over a few days, of mastering the software and even learning a bit of HTML code are all achievements in which I can take some small measure of pride, allowing me to feel there are aspects of my life I still have the power to drive forward.
3 comments:
Rob,
You are a treasure and testimony to hope and everything that is still worth believing in in a world that sometimes seems overun with hedonistic arseholes... You can continue to take pride in all of your achievements however humble they may seem...
We think and speak of you often !
R, J and F xxx
lobika,
I admire your clarity, your way with words. You may feel foggy yet your writing is lucid,moving and real. Thought of writing a book chronicling your days?????
Meaningful for many. Thank you for blogging even though I don't quite know what it means, With great love and admiration, vee
Thank you all for your kind words.
R
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